A Bohra woman’s personal essay about her experience of Female Genital Cutting, published on Sahiyo’s blog last year, has won the prestigious Laadli Media Award for Gender Sensitivity 2015-16.

The essay, titled ‘It was a part of me…part of my womanhood‘, won the award for Best Blog in the ‘Web-blogs’ category in the eighth edition of the Western region Laadli Awards, which celebrate gender sensitive advertising and journalism in India. The award ceremony was held at Ahmedabad’s Gujarati Sahitya Parishad on February 23, with prominent dancer and artiste Mallika Sarabhai as the chief guest.

The winning essay describes the author’s memory of undergoing ‘Khatna’ and her struggle to come to terms with it. Read below the jury’s citation on her powerful narrative:

This essay was among the first few accounts of Bohra women willing to share their stories on Sahiyo’s blog when it launched in December 2015. Sahiyo believes in the power of storytelling and this blog is a story-sharing platform for all those who feel passionately about khatna or FGC and who wish to see the practice end.

We would like to say a big thank you to Population First, the organiser of the Laadli Awards, for honouring Sahiyo’s blog contributor through this award!

By Alifya Sulemanji

Country: United States

In the past few years, we have seen an increase in the awareness of FGM/C in the Dawoodi Bohra community, and it has led to many discussions amongst community members. There is a large number of people who were hesitant about the procedure, and due to a lack of awareness about the harmful effects of FGM/C have been carrying on with this ritual. Today, there is so much more information available for people who question the practice and want to know what it really entails. Today, their questions can be answered. Today, because of media awareness, even men from our community know that Khatna has happened to women they know; whereas for decades they were not aware.

Last year, after the New York Jammat (congregation) issued a letter to the entire community that banned FGM/C, many people in the community became aware that khatna was an act that violated human rights. The letter also made them aware that if anyone attempted to carry out FGM/C and they were caught, they would be prosecuted for doing so.

Recently, a mother from the community approached me and told me that she disliked that her older daughter had to go through khatna because her in-laws had pressured that the girl goes through it. She also told me that she was very happy that her younger daughter doesn’t have to go through this atrocity. She told me it was commendable to see that we were working to raise awareness about harmful effects of FGM/C within the Dawoodi Bohra community.

Another friend from India recently wrote me and told me that since she has read so much about FGM/C in the media, she has been able to gather the courage to say no to having her daughter undergo it. She also told me that she felt encouraged to say no to the practice after reading my Facebook post against Khatna, and after reading my FGM/C story on the Sahiyo website. My friend told me that she is still facing pressure from her mother-in-law to get it done to her daughter, but she is now trying her best to ensure that situation does not occur. She also told me that because or her own decision to not have her daughter undergo it, she has seen a ripple effect, and another friend of hers has also gathered courage to speak up and stand up for her daughter to ensure they don’t undergo it as well.

It is important to teach people that there is nothing good about khatna, it only leads to physical mental turmoil for little girls and women.

The theory behind this ritual is that after a girl has her khatna done, she will lose her libido and therefore, she will not stray from the marriage bed, and she will be loyal to her husband. This type of thinking is completely a misconception and is misinformation passed down by religious leaders.  

I have many non-Bohra/Muslim friends who don’t go through this procedure and who did not indulge in sex before they were married or who never engage in adultery, whereas I know women from the Bohra community who have had premarital sex in spite of undergoing khatna. Khatna has nothing to do with one’s sexual desire, but it certainly does takes away the woman’s pleasure or sexual satisfaction, which is unfair and cruel.

By: Anonymous

Country: Singapore

Community: Malay Muslim

Growing up:

I was told as a child, that every girl had to go through it. There is basically NOBODY that you know who hasn’t gone through it. And I BELIEVED everything my mother said. 

Perceptions Ingrained in our Minds:

It is dirty, unhygienic, curbs your sexual desires. Basically, what their mothers tell them, they relay it back to us.

Working adult:

I became a nurse. I studied, learned, saw the anatomy of the human body. As a nurse, I cleaned the vagina of women of different ethnicities. Of course, I noticed the difference. They had the hood and the two labia folds, and I did not.

At that time, as a Malay Muslim, I firmly believed that “my vagina is cleaner” than those who were not circumcised. I felt I belonged to a much “higher status” because I was “cut” and they were not. My fellow female Muslim nurses shared the same sentiments.

Marriage:

I had an inter-racial Muslim marriage. I realized my sexual desire plummeted and I wasn’t really interested in sex much longer. I had a private conversation with my husband about it, and he was surprised that FGC was done in many Asian countries. He mentioned that as a Muslim himself, in his own country, FGC was not done. In his country none of his sisters underwent FGC.

Delivery:

I had a natural home birth for my first born daughter, assisted by my own husband.

The way the delivery occurred was unplanned, but it was the most beautiful experience for us both.

Post-Partum Worries:

The natural delivery left a stinging burning sensation on my clitoris region. I naturally thought it will go away. But it prolonged much longer that I expected.

A few months passed, and I still felt a strange sensation in my clitoris region. When I urinated, it felt like someone had punched me – it was sore. I refused to go for a health check-up as I didn’t want ANYONE to touch me. I didn’t want to touch it myself.

It’s coming to 10 months now past my baby’s birth, and my husband and I haven’t resumed sex yet. At first, I was fearful of the pain that might arise. Then, I didn’t want to experience any more intermittent sore sensation in my clitoris region. Thirdly, I didn’t have the sexual drive or desire mainly because I was breastfeeding.

I deeply pondered: Why am I still feeling this? Why does it still felt sore? Is it because of the FGC that my mother made sure I underwent when I was still a baby?

I haven’t talked to my mother about it yet. I guess no one talks openly about it. They just “snip it” when you’re a baby and everyone stays silent about it. I had many questions in mind! Was it done by trained personnel? Does the answer to that question matter anyway, since it’s wrong to do it?

My Baby and Social Pressure about FGC:

My mother kept insisting that I bring my baby for “sunat” to the clinic. She said it will be “over before you know it” – swiftly done.

My husband, on the other hand, refused to have it done to our daughter. He said women in his country did not have it done.

I started my own journey of reading and gaining more knowledge on FGC.

In 2016, at 30 years of age, it affects me now. I was upset that my mother did it purely due to social pressure. Even if you’re an educated woman, social pressure can still influence the way you make a decision.

I was in a mosque a few weeks back, a lady in her 50-60s approached me and chatted about my baby. She handed me her name card which indicated her business services. It read, “sunat perempuan”. I was shocked and disappointed. It is 2017, and still, this is being done by an unlicensed passerby who easily roamed the community promoting her services.

At present:

I joined a Facebook Group for young mothers in Singapore where women’s topics are discussed. One of the issues asked by many young mothers is “WHERE can I take my NEWBORN DAUGHTER for sunat? Which clinic is best?”

This question showed that young educated mothers are still unaware of FGC and its non-relation to Islam. They continue it because THEIR own mothers tell them to do it or that it is the NORM to perform “sunat” after you give birth to your newborn.

There they go, commenting and discussing the rate of several clinics, the packages that come with it (Ear Piercing + Sunat) and their good experience with the doctors who provided such packages to benefit themselves.

Every time I see such questions, I cringe. I commented on those posts about FGC but nobody has taken notice of my comments. Yes, I do hear mother’s voice that they are fearful to see the procedure done on their baby girls, YET they want it done. How conflicting! Other mothers who had undergone it with their newborn baby girls started giving reassurance that “it’ll be over before you know it. Stay strong mummy!” Subsequently, I messaged the mothers privately and gave them social media links (videos/texts) to educate themselves on FGC, especially on Islamic & social views.

It’s still a very long road to adjust the mindset of the Singapore Malay Muslim community on FGC. It’s done openly without a tinge of guilt in their hearts.

I’m sad it was done on me but I will NEVER let it happen to my offsprings.
When we educate the women, we educate the entire nation. Women have to choose wisely what is right and wrong. Don’t succumb to social pressure – just because everyone is doing it, doesn’t make it right.

On International Zero Tolerance on FGC/M Day 2017, Sahiyo is very happy to share it’s new look, with it’s new identity:

We have reinvented the Sahiyo logo in colors of peach and purple in solid, unique typography.

The typography illustrates ‘Sahiyo’ (Gujarati word for friends) written in English, at the same time connects to it’s Gujarati roots  by depicting the letter ‘Y’ which could be read in both English and Gujarati lettering.

We have chosen colors peach and purple to communicate strong positive vibrancy of the work that we do.

In the words of our designer Dhwani Shah,

To me it (the logo colors) reflects determination of the team to work on the issue. Peach as a color is close to skin and can be drawn as a parallel to body positivity.

To us the combination is a statement on vibrancy as well as our continued struggle.

While peach symbolizes postivity, purple is a color of struggle with it’s long standing connotations of resistance within the feminist movements.

We hope you like our new look!

By Alisha Bhagat

Country: United States & India

I made Deen and Duniya in 2004 before my senior year in college. I received a Vira Heinz grant for women in leadership and thought it would be interesting to turn an anthropological lens on my own community – the Dawoodi Bohras. I am particularly interested in the role of women in the Bohra community and wanted to better understand certain dilemmas I saw while growing up in the community. When I sat down with people one-on-one while making this documentary, I found I was able to connect with them more and find out their logic for observing certain practices – be that science or faith.

The film is intended for a wide audience both inside and outside the community. For non-Bohras I wanted to show the positive things about our community and the everyday joy that we experience in things like sports, prayer, communal meals and family. I also wanted to highlight some of the issues that all women in patriarchal societies face – control over women’s sexuality, bodily autonomy, and the dual burden of work and running a household. I did not set out to make a film about FGM but I knew from the beginning that it should be included.

(To watch the video click here.)

 It is both a wonderful and frustrating time to be a Bohra woman. As the film highlights, we are given so many opportunities for achieving educational and career goals. We are quick to adopt new technology and want to live in the modern world.  At the same time, we are often required to shoulder a greater burden than men. We have to work hard in our careers and also cook and clean and raise children. We have a lengthy Iddat (mourning) period that men don’t have, and are silenced from talking about the things happening to our bodies. I recall knowing from an early age that my father and brother were circumcised but it was only after I went to college that my mom revealed to me that she had been also. I found it so interesting that a practice so widespread was so taboo.

Storytelling can be a powerful tool in creating social change. For example, a group of researchers in Sudan found that entertaining films can change attitudes and reduce gender bias. For those within the community, the purpose of the film is to start a conversation about why we observe certain practices. I’m proud that it can continue to do that. For years my parents used to show the film to every bohra guest that came over to our house (and I can assure you, that’s a lot). In the film we intentionally ask open-ended questions and the views of the interviewees are their own. Often after seeing the film, folks would share their own stories. My hope is that the film inspires you to do the same. 

The segment on FGM begins at the 19 min mark. However, it is recommended that the film be viewed in its entirety to understand the practice within its cultural context.

Bio:
Alisha Bhagat is passionate about sustainable development. She is a futurist, feminist, and avid gamer. She lives in New York with her husband, beloved daughter, and adorable kitty.

by Ashraf Engineer

Age: 41
Country: India

Picture this if you can without your heart racing and eyes welling up. A girl, let’s say she’s seven years old, is dressed up by her mother and told she’s being taken for a walk and an ice cream. She clings to her mother’s arm in glee and follows her, secure and happy. She is led to a house in the neighborhood where her mother undresses her and holds her down. A strange woman removes a razor blade and in a single, heart-stopping motion cuts the child’s clitoral hood.

The pain will ebb, the flowing blood will stanch but the scars will remain for life. A child has been damaged and her trust broken. 

I hail from the Dawoodi Bohra community where female genital cutting (FGC) is prevalent but the thought ofsubjecting my little girl to it never once entered my mind. She is the joy of my life, she gives it meaning. There was no wayI could do that to her. Among the many ugly manifestations of patriarchy, I believe FGC is perhaps the most horrific. We see everywhere how society feels the need to control every aspect of a woman's life - from whether she can live aftershe is born and whether she can get an education to whom she can marry and when. This attitude often extends to controlling her sexuality – through FGC.

FGC is one of the most serious human rights issues before us today. It is an ongoing practice rarely talked about even by those who have undergone it, and it is not part of the public consciousness. Like marital rape and abuse, it exists around us but is rarely thought about.

According to UNICEF data, there are at least 200 million girls and women across 30 countries who have been cut. If they were to form a country, it would be the sixth most populous in the world. We are looking at an alarming crime against humanity that needs our urgent attention.

FGC is illegal in many countries – a United Nations resolution against it was signed by 194 countries in 2012 – but its abandonment will require more than a law.

Since the root of the problem is patriarchy, a social system in which males are all-powerful and wield great authority over women, men must become an integral part of the solution. FGC is perpetrated on women, but I believe it’s done to satisfy the male craving for control of female sexuality. Indeed, societies in which FGC is practiced tend to be dominated by men.

It’s time for men to speak out against this harmful practice. It’s their duty, and their collective voice will matter. If they wish to, they can make a difference. Men need to stand up and be counted – primarily as fathers of girls in danger. 

This will help men too. Secure, happier women are necessary for stronger, fulfilling relationships and a progressive society.

Here are a few steps that can be taken immediately by individuals and governments:

• Pass a law that criminalizes FGC in India. The movement against this practice is gaining momentum and it’s time for the government to act.

• Start a nationwide awareness and education initiative – targeting men especially – that underscores FGC’s psychological impact as well as the danger to societal health.

• Make awareness about FGC a part of sex education in schools.

As the father of a young girl, even the thought of FGC creates a hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach. That such cruelty can be wreaked on anyone, let alone a child that has no clue of what is happening to her, breaks my heart.

As a father, your primary instinct is to protect your daughter and help her grow. You can’t do that by mutilating her body and shattering her trust.

(Ashraf Engineer, a former journalist, is a communication and marketing consultant. He recently released his first book, a Kindle-only release titled Bricks of Blood.)

(Note from Sahiyo: As an individual, another immediate step you can take to help bring an end to FGC is to sign this petition by Sahiyo and 31 international organizations. Click here.)